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‘Round Midnight 4

It’s becoming tradition. Every year since 2007, on New Year’s Day (or thereabouts) I’ve written a little post talking about all of the things that happened in the past year. (See previous years in review: 2006, 2007, 2008.)

Looking back on them is always an interesting experience. It’s kind of amazing to see how far I’ve come in the past four years, and fun to imagine what will change in the next year (hopefully good things!).

Anyway, without further babbling from me, here’s 2009 in review!

January – the month of friendships – Began to expand my social circle when Derek started working swing shift; found out about a few friends’ pregnancies; got U-Verse – actual television for the first time in like two years!; met up with my parents in Vegas
February – the month of reflection – Celebrated one year with Derek; got really into blogging pretty regularly; began thinking about the past and starting to grow from it.
March – the month of growing pains – Found out I was going to be an aunt; watched my younger sister start planning her wedding; started getting sick more often.
April – the month of missing you – Lost my great-grandmother; turned 23; continued to keep getting sick.
May – the month of admitting the problem – Realized my sicknesses were being caused mostly by psychological issues; began seeing a psychiatrist; pretty much hit rock bottom as far as being depressed and hating life. Not a good month.
June – the month of facing the problem – Started Lexapro for anxiety and depression; began biweekly therapy sessions with the psychiatrist.
July – the month of improving & looking ahead – Started feeling better for the first time in ages; began looking forward to the family vacation; Derek turned 29.
August – the month of family – Went to Florida with Derek and my family; met my little cousin, Alexis, for the first time; began to realize how much I love my grandmother and hope to be like her when I’m older; began to face some of the issues related to feeling out of place among my siblings.
September – the month of learning to live again – Started talk therapy with the psychiatrist; explored how I was living my life and what was important to me and Derek in our living situation; found out my ex was moving to China and tried to work out how I felt about it; met up with my parents and grandparents in Vegas.
October – the month of kiddies – especially RORY! – My niece, Lorelai, was born the day before my brother (her daddy) turned 28; decided to start volunteering at Kidspace; visited my friends in New York
November – the month of thankfulness – Withdrew from the online world a little to focus myself on life; spent a wonderful Thanksgiving with Derek and his family
December – the month of “home is where the heart is” – Stayed a week with my brother in Indiana; met Rory, finally, and fell in love – she’s the best niece ever!; visited my parents and grandparents; then came home to my Derek again… and my home.

Overall, this year was a lot less eventful than last year – that is for sure – but it was still a really important year. I dealt with a lot of things this year, a lot of very difficult things, even. But I’m already feeling so much stronger than this time last year, and I know I can only get stronger from here.

I’m looking forward to starting 2010. Farewell, 2009.

O Christmas Tree

Forgive me, this is mostly going to be a photo post. :) I borrowed a tripod from Derek and took some gorgeous photos of our tree, including some macros/close-ups (well I used a macro lens anyway) of some of my favorite ornaments.

We love the Christmas tree this year. We had a few little mishaps – the trunk was too short for our tree stand, and then the bowl they put on the tree at the lot started leaking, so we had to make a quick fix – but it turned out really gorgeous. Derek loves it too. :) And it smells so good! Growing up, my parents didn’t really ever buy real Christmas trees, we always put up a fake one (until I moved out, then they started getting real ones, what the heck, mom?!). There’s really no comparison, though… The real one smells so good, and it looks so much better!

The lights are LED lights and kind of have a blue tint to them. On long exposures, with a white balance set to cut out the orange light coming in from the courtyard lamps, they look super blue. I kind of like it!

See? Orange lights! It looks like the courtyard is on fire or something.

This little guy was made by my good friend Christin last year. I like to think he’s protecting the tree. :)

I’m so happy to have my own little ornament collection. They’re mostly blue, green and silver – and last year I found these adorable snowmen ornaments at Target, which fit perfectly!

When we get flat cards or photos I like to put them on the tree. This one my grandma had printed and sent to us, it’s a great picture of us. :)

Here’s my fishie! I’m a huge marine biology nerd — Chrissy even made me a clownfish hat, I’ll have to get photos soon! — and so when I saw this little fishie I had to have him. My ex’s mom bought him for me at Saks Fifth Avenue in New York a few years ago. He’s still one of my favorites. :)

My mom gave me this Angel of Learning for my tree. I love how the light was shining on her in this photo.

And this one was from my friend Kelly. Along with our friend Sarah, we share a very special almost sisterly bond — that is best served with a nice pinot noir!

You may be wondering, with my professed Buddhist tendencies and lack of a strong religious sense, why do I have a Christmas tree? Well, in the next few days I have a big entry planned, in which I’ll talk all about what the holiday season means to me! Be on the lookout.

Until then, take care, stay warm and enjoy the holidays!

Under the Sea

While checking my RSS feeds the other day, I read through one of Nimil’s most recent entries in which she used a prompt from something called mindbump. Mindbump just happens to be a freaking awesome concept — it provides you with random blog entry topics submitted by users! I submitted a couple and decided to use one for this entry. Watch for more in the future! :)

Ok, here goes nothing…

suggested by Spelling Search

“As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up? If that dream died at some point, explain why.”

I don’t think a lot of people realize this about me, but I’ve always been really good at and interested in science. My middle school actually featured a “magnet” program for Math, Science and Technology, and science was always one of my favorite classes. I even took two years of Physics in high school (and took the AP Physics exam). Big science lover, right here.

In elementary school, I decided that I wanted to be a marine biologist. Specifically, I wanted to work with whales, dolphins, manatees and other sea mammals. Being the silly little nerd I was, I even wrote stories about becoming a marine biologist and made up stories about the animals I wanted to study. My parents encouraged this, and took me to places like Homosassa Springs and Sarasota Jungle Gardens in Florida, where I was able to see manatees and other sea critters up close. At the Indy Zoo, I always insisted on seeing the dolphin shows and spent tons of time in the aquatic animal areas.

And, of course, every year when we would go to Florida for vacation, I’d be on the lookout for various sea creatures. One of the highlights of all my trips there was seeing a dolphin/porpoise swimming less than 20 feet away from us.

Then, in sixth grade, I found out that our school had an orchestra class, where I could learn to play a stringed instrument. Somehow this became more important to me at that moment, and I started playing viola. That’s pretty much where my dreams of being a marine biologist ended.

But I still love marine biology. I took a class on it at Sarah Lawrence, and loved every minute of it. Blue Planet is one of my favorite documentary series (as well as Planet Earth, but, let’s face it, there aren’t nearly enough ocean-related segments!!) and I can’t help but switch to it whenever it’s on TV, then watch it, completely engrossed in every little detail, for hours on end. I’ve been to some of the best aquariums in the country – Shedd in Chicago and Monterey Bay in Monterey, CA – as well as a few lesser known but still awesome ones – like the Coney Island/NY Aquarium and Mandalay Bay’s Shark Reef in Vegas. And I could and would gladly go to any of them again – I can spend hours just watching the fish, sharks, sea mammals… even the little crabs!

And I still get a longing feeling when I’m standing near the ocean, looking out into the waves…