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‘Round Midnight 4

It’s becoming tradition. Every year since 2007, on New Year’s Day (or thereabouts) I’ve written a little post talking about all of the things that happened in the past year. (See previous years in review: 2006, 2007, 2008.)

Looking back on them is always an interesting experience. It’s kind of amazing to see how far I’ve come in the past four years, and fun to imagine what will change in the next year (hopefully good things!).

Anyway, without further babbling from me, here’s 2009 in review!

January – the month of friendships – Began to expand my social circle when Derek started working swing shift; found out about a few friends’ pregnancies; got U-Verse – actual television for the first time in like two years!; met up with my parents in Vegas
February – the month of reflection – Celebrated one year with Derek; got really into blogging pretty regularly; began thinking about the past and starting to grow from it.
March – the month of growing pains – Found out I was going to be an aunt; watched my younger sister start planning her wedding; started getting sick more often.
April – the month of missing you – Lost my great-grandmother; turned 23; continued to keep getting sick.
May – the month of admitting the problem – Realized my sicknesses were being caused mostly by psychological issues; began seeing a psychiatrist; pretty much hit rock bottom as far as being depressed and hating life. Not a good month.
June – the month of facing the problem – Started Lexapro for anxiety and depression; began biweekly therapy sessions with the psychiatrist.
July – the month of improving & looking ahead – Started feeling better for the first time in ages; began looking forward to the family vacation; Derek turned 29.
August – the month of family – Went to Florida with Derek and my family; met my little cousin, Alexis, for the first time; began to realize how much I love my grandmother and hope to be like her when I’m older; began to face some of the issues related to feeling out of place among my siblings.
September – the month of learning to live again – Started talk therapy with the psychiatrist; explored how I was living my life and what was important to me and Derek in our living situation; found out my ex was moving to China and tried to work out how I felt about it; met up with my parents and grandparents in Vegas.
October – the month of kiddies – especially RORY! – My niece, Lorelai, was born the day before my brother (her daddy) turned 28; decided to start volunteering at Kidspace; visited my friends in New York
November – the month of thankfulness – Withdrew from the online world a little to focus myself on life; spent a wonderful Thanksgiving with Derek and his family
December – the month of “home is where the heart is” – Stayed a week with my brother in Indiana; met Rory, finally, and fell in love – she’s the best niece ever!; visited my parents and grandparents; then came home to my Derek again… and my home.

Overall, this year was a lot less eventful than last year – that is for sure – but it was still a really important year. I dealt with a lot of things this year, a lot of very difficult things, even. But I’m already feeling so much stronger than this time last year, and I know I can only get stronger from here.

I’m looking forward to starting 2010. Farewell, 2009.

Sleeping In

As much as I’ve always hated being sick, I’ve found that since I started taking Lexapro I hate it even more.

Since I started taking it, I’ve been in a much better mood overall, of course. I don’t fall into my depressive, mopey states nearly as often and when I do it’s much easier to snap out of them.

That is, unless I’m sick.

It’s always been that when I’m sick I tend to get really grumpy and generally irritable, and in the past getting sick has even sparked some of my depressions. It’s just not fun; I’m uncomfortable, homebound, exhausted and just generally blah.

And, apparently, even Lexapro can’t help that much when I’m sick.

I missed two days of work last week and today is day two that I’ve missed this week. I check in every hour or so and my boss is very understanding, but it stresses me out not being there and having control or at least knowledge of what’s going on with my team.

I’m trying to stay positive and not let myself succumb, I’m telling myself that it’s just that I’m sick and stuck in the house getting stir crazy.

Does anyone else get like this when they’re sick? :\

On a lighter note: Thank goodness I have Derek. He made pasta for me for lunch and he keeps letting me sleep in even though it means missing lunch with him before he leaves for work. He even makes tea for me when he gets home from work, even though it’s after midnight and he’s tired. I have no idea what I’d do without him…

Anyway… Off to cook some rice, drink some tea and veg out in front of a Degrassi marathon (guilty pleasure woo).

Tree Hugger

More and more often lately, I find myself becoming increasingly restless.

Part of the reason is because I’ve been sick the past couple of days – a nasty little cold. It kind of sucks not being able to get out of the house very much.

But I feel like another part of the reason is just that I haven’t really done anything with my life in a little while. I’ve just been going through the motions – getting up, going to work, going home, going to bed, lather, rinse, repeat – with very little to break up the monotony. Not that our life is necessarily monotonous – we do things a little different every day, of course – but outside of work I find myself not really doing a whole lot.

The other day I heard about Disney’s announcement that in 2010 they’ll be offering free admission to one of their parks for anyone who volunteers for a day (of course, with a few restrictions/caveats) – they’re calling it “Give a Day, Get a Disney Day.” I signed up for more info and decided to check out HandsOn, the volunteering network that Disney teamed up with for the opportunities they’d accept for free admission.

While perusing some of the opportunities, checking out what HandsOn is all about and just piddling around while I waited for some tests to run at work, I ended up on the website for LA Works, a Los Angeles-based volunteer network. “Cool!” I thought. “I bet I can find some really close to Glendale.”

The more I looked through the opportunities, the more I found myself wanting to apply to them, especially the ones that had to do with being an outdoor educational guide at children’s museums, leading nature walks for kids or mentoring teenage girls. I love kids, and I love spending time with them and helping them learn new and fun things. And I love the outdoors, which several of the opportunities offered.

Suddenly I realized — this could help to solve my restlessness.

I mean, volunteering is a great way to get out of the house, and of course it’s a great way to help out the community. In high school, I volunteered for several years at the local hospital – I worked at the information desk and directed visitors to other parts of the hospital. While I longed to have more interaction with the patients, and especially the kids, in the hospital, I was happy just to be able to get out on the weekends and help out in the community. Volunteering with kids — especially in situations where I’d be teaching them about plants and animals — sounds a lot more stimulating and fun, and the good feelings I had when I volunteered at the hospital would naturally come along too, of course.

So I sent interest emails to a couple of opportunities, and recently heard back from both of them. One is volunteering for Kidspace, a children’s museum in Pasadena, where I’d be working as an educational guide in one of their garden learning spaces, and the other is for a nature walk program for families, where I’d be either helping keep the group together on the walks or, if I’m lucky, leading a walk myself. Either way, they both sound amazing.

I’m really excited. I have to email the nature walk program back for more information, and I’m scheduled to talk to one of the directors at Kidspace on Monday. I’ll keep you updated on what happens! :)